Yesterday was just a bag of disappointment and I forgot to add that part of my angst yesterday was the realtor telling me that one of the major problems with selling my condo is the new mortgage laws. Because my property is designated a condominium, different regulations apply than if the property was a house. There are specific guidelines for things such as how much money is held in reserve by the condo association, for instance. Well, we don’t have a condo association. There’s me and Adam. Things sort of work like this:

Hey, roof looks like crap.
Yep.
We need it replaced.
Yep. I’ll make some calls… get some estimates.
Good. Pick the cheapest and I’ll cut you a check for half.
Ok.

That’s how we roll, but the mortgage people don’t get that. The people who wrote the new regulations think condos always belong to complexes and forget that houses broken into sections also fall into that category. The worse problem, though, is the fact that is is now required, required, that the buyer put 20% down for most programs if they buy a condo. My condo is a modest thing that falls at the upper basement-lower ground floor end of the price scale and people shopping in that range are likely not going to have that amount of cash lying around. So, I’m getting screwed every way I turn trying to get this friggin’ property off of my hands…

Today almost had me screaming, too. Long ago, I had a new floor put in my condo’s kitchen and had to have the gas stove disconnected for the work. I never go itrl reconnected, because I didn’t cook anymore. Now, I have to get that put together and my first phone call made me so mad I nearly spit. When it was disconnected, I called a plumber, they came and did the work and that was that. So, I called a plumber to reconnect it and ran into a wall. The woman on the phone tells me they would need to pull a permit ($75) and then have an inspector come out afterward to check the work (fee unknown). I asked her if she was nuts and she said that they always do this when dealing with gas to avoid liability. I reminded her that it was just putting a hose back on and she didn’t care. Then, the conversation turned to whether I had the spec sheet for the oven. I again asked her if she was nuts and she said that if necessary, the inspector could look it up, but the oven would have to meet the designated specs for proper placement in the kitchen or else it could not be hooked up. I reminded her that this was a disconnect from an existing installation and she said that if the inspector decided it was too close to a cabinet, I would have to have to get the kitchen rearranged. I was proud that I politely hung up on her and not slammed the phone down while calling her a money-sucking idiot. Oh, and they couldn’t schedule the work for at least a week.

Call another place and they’re coming out tomorrow morning and “it’ll only take a few minutes so he’ll be done quickly.” That’s my kind of service. I had another call to make to get routine maintenance on my furnace and was not surprised that it took a week to book, this is the time when every person in New England is getting their heating systems readied for the winter. And the company I called had a very friendly woman on the line who was very easy to deal with, so it was a fairly painless experience.

Now, I have to shuffle my earnings to finance these bits of home care, but they have to be done, whether the property is sold or rented. Maybe I can get a tax write-off somehow. Or just go ahead with my master scheme to find a lonely old billionaire…

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