And not for a good reason like I got lucky or anything. Peacefully slumbering at 3:00 am when a “cheep” echoes through the house. The dogs go on high alert and I think – Crap, smoke alarm needs a battery. Would that were the case. When my smoke detectors need batteries they chirp about every hour or so. This was the carbon monoxide detector and it chirps every 30 FREAKING SECONDS until it gets new batteries. I find something new every day for which to hate this house’s previous owner. Needless to say, going back to sleep was off the table until the situation was rectified. Step one – get stepladder. That’s in the basement and requires shoes and also clothing, since I don’t tend to wear either when I go to bed. Step ladder dragged from basement. Then it was the battery worry. I normally have a variety of batteries in the house to power the battalion of remote controls and other sundry devices I keep around, but what if this sensor takes a special type? One that requires driving to the 24-hour pharmacy with a prayer on my lips that they stock the necessary kind. Luckily – took 3 AA cells and I have crates of those. So, one battery replacement, one restored ladder, one divesting of garments and back into bed. For about 5 minutes. With all the ruckus, the dogs were now fully awake and not inclined to change that situation. By 3:45 am, I was parked in front of the TV, playing Bookworm Adventures on the computer and waiting for the sun to rise.

The one luxury I still cling to is a housekeeping service that visits every three weeks and today was their day for work. So, the dogs and I were out of the house b 8:30 am to visit local parks, do some window shopping and generally kill time until the housekeepers were gone. While puttering at Walmart, I got a wild hair across my wide ass to pick up a circular loom kit. I have a knitting machine (manual) that I love to death and which I use to make nice pieces quickly. But, carting it into the living room, with it’s table is a hassle, so I wanted something to use to make small pieces while vegetating on the couch. It took some work to figure out how to use a circular loom since the instruction booklet read as if it were translated from Japanese to Polish and then Polish to English (exactly the translation route an online Manga I read last night went through, which produced some very interesting phrasing combinations). Once I got the hang of things by trial and error, I had a baby hat created in no time. Since I know no babies and wouldn’t part with my little hat to one of those screaming snot monsters if I was paid to, my little hat will serve as a coffee-cup cozy. Next project – neck warmers for the dogs to use on winter walks.

Now that my paint crew is gone, I am going to indulge in a little time on my deck trying to ignore the d-bag children who live a few doors down. Actually the whole family are douches and, to make matters worse they have a pool. A real, in-ground pool that the children play in every day. And they have a pool party with other screamers on Wednesdays. This family apparently does not believe in teaching children that screaming at the top of their lungs is not appropriate in a quiet neighborhood, so every day I get to listen to the dulcet strains of shrieking, screaming, yelling… I will admit to an oversensitivity to noise brought on by my previous neighbor and her fricking brats, so I have yet to don a hockey mask and go after them with a machete. But the summer is not over yet…

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